A curator's collection: We Want You To ... Drop the Big One Now!

Monday, January 18, 2016

We Want You To ... Drop the Big One Now!

Since 1984 (yes, that 1984), when Ron Reagan declared it was, "Morning in America"and it became de rigeur for every candidate to elective office to endorse the proposition that God created U$.

1/18/16

Since adoption of that proposition, it has become a national rite of passage that whenever U$, the people, gather at sporting cathedrals to worship the men (and select few women), who strive on the battlefields of sport; be it the gridiron, diamond or court, to genuflect to the symbols of Sport, God and Country at the beginning and again, in the middle of every contest in an invariably futile attempt to warble the Star Spangled Banner and God Bless America proving conclusively that no one loves their country more than U$ do.

Signs of creeping jingoism are everywhere. I did not realize just how prevalent it had become until I inadvertently tuned the radio dial to a college football game just in time to hear the announcer breathlessly intone that, "80,000 people stood and cheered through the Star Spangled Banner, the Pledge of Allegiance and God Bless America' before advising me that, "that's what college football is all about!" (And all this time, I thought it was to better serve bettors and alumni benefactors).

I was disappointed but far from surprised when word came down from a Capitol Hill Congressional oversight committee that the Department of Defense paid more than $10 Million of U$ dollars to stage patriotic ceremonies at sporting events.

U.S. Air Force to Pay for More Stadium Flyovers to Inspire Sports Fans to Join Up

Oh sure, realizing that these patriotic displays are bought and paid for diminishes the emotional wallop, but hey! That's simply the U$ way and hasn't it always been thus?

Why should U$ care if the Patriots, (New England gridiron variety), or any other sports franchise fill their coffers, (in the Pats case, to the tune of $250,000), by giving the nation's military men and women a chance to compete in Americas' Got Talent by warbling Frances Scott Key's interminable anthem?

In non-conscription eras, U$ military has always had an eye open for innovative ways to lure the willing and the unsuspecting into its' lair. But now, those Mad Men's ways and means are targeted with far greater precision. Recently, the NFL broadcasting empire took special, and repeated note that the helmets of their sporting combatants were adorned with Purple Hearts while the Carolina Panthers sideline jerseys were festooned with military style camouflage in honor of U$ men and women serving around the world. It's a gesture, but I withhold the verdict on sincerity until I know how much it cost U$.

Military Mad Men have been working overtime on recruitment strategy for generations. Just as broadcast networks do not give their time away for free to present new car ads and they aren't likely to bestow any such largess on the military.

Given the encroaching groundswell, now seems a propitious time to pull back the veil and meet the new boss: Well, what do you know? It's the same as the old boss.

Here's a trip back in time and around the world.

This 1950's Air Force recruitment ad came complete with cartoon graphics and a snappy jingle through the wonders of the family Philco. This was as close to reality as the Military Mad Man of the day would permit U$. And gosh, they sure made war look like fun, didn't they?

Looks like the Air Force had a top notch crew of Mad Men because they were back at it again and kind enough to let us know that a stint in the Air Force was every bit as swell as a flight to Honolulu.

Yes, it was all Shangri-La and gosh, they sure made war look like a day at the beach.

Not to be outdone by their Air Force confederates, the Army got into the act with this 1962 glob of insincerity but, instead of offering a trip to Honolulu, the Army gave us these wonderful choices: Ride snowmobiles, water ski, go rock climbing or join the Artillery Corps and drop The Big One on somebody somewhere else in the world.

US Army Recruitment 1962

How much payola do you think U$ bestowed on Murray the K and Allen Freed to get this turgid march to the the Top of the Pops?

Army recruitment -1986

Following the death of the draft, U$ needed a new way to lure the willing and the unsuspecting alike so they offered new fangled toys like computers in tanks, Guaranteed to rain hell fire on every bad guy the world over.

There is nothing on this green earth stronger than the U$ Army.

Not the oceans nor the valley's nor even the ocean's, white with foam ...

1981 U$ NAVY

"It's not just a job, it's an adventure".

A boat ride to Hong Kong? Sign me up!

Don't listen to those people around the world. The U$ Navy is a global force for good.

These days, the U$ Army offers Army values, warrior ethos and, if you're smart enough, lots of other brainy rewards.

Armed Forces Update posted the vids below and many more, each complete with detail like how much the U$ Navy weighs. I would have bet the earth could not carry so much tonnage but it looks like U$ do. When U$ MadMen decided to send a SERIOUS message to the part of the world that wasn't U$, U$ wasn't kidding!

Here's U$ sending a 7 minute video of U$ muscle led by Comrade Trump, flexing for Terrorists of all stripes, (especially those pesky brown ones).

U$ may be the biggest, largest and toughest, but we are not alone. Here is some of what is going on in the rest of the world.

And the Madmen Award for Tugging Heart Strings goes to ... Mother Russia, produced and directed by Vladimir Putin.